Congratulations : The Oedipus Complex Was Your Best Ever Marketing Tool. by John Doyle

Your serial killer's baritone did make me shiver

just a little, and those tattoos, oh goodness,


did you get them in prison? oh, you didn't, that's a shame,

though when pops tried to enlist you in cadet school


I can understand a certain hatred, and they say revenge should

really go all out, that, I can dig soul brother. Hey, tell ya what braw,


let's tap our fists together quasi-homey style,

like we're that whitey putz in Gran Torino all the black hoodlums look at


like he's a douche,

and even Eastwood respects the would-be sexual felons more


than he does him. And that can soon be you, just make sure you go

a few more days without washing, looks perfect when you go live online,


skunks, pine-martin and other assorted critters can soon go sleep beside you,

semi-docile while you develop the semi-feral Grizzly Adams look -


makes you look so withdrawn,

like all the shit you’ve been though



since discovering Metallica really drags you down,

and makes you the Shelley of the 21st Century;



or should that be the Age of Aquarius, braw?

Oh, Pops called to say he loves you by the way,



the nurses really think

you should say hello

John Doyle became a Mod again in the summer of 2017 to fight off his impending mid-life crisis; whether this has been a success remains to be seen. He has has two collections published to date, A Stirring at Dusk in 2017, and Songs for Boys Called Wendell Gomez in 2018, both on PSKI's Porch.

He is based in Maynooth, County Kildare, Ireland. All he asks is that you leave your guns at the door and tie up your horses before your enter.