The Futility of Existence by Scott Simmons

What do you think about the cereal that died to extend your life?
And all those precious artificial ingredients that were entirely pissed out from your nostrils.

If you feel guilty like I do then just simply have to beat the all sin from your body via a leather whip wielded by a 5’3 Korean Dominatrix being paid 200 dollars an hour.

Or you can watch the entire broadway musical known as Spongebob Squarenuts.
And have a tear filled hump of shame on a fire hydrant in the streets of Manhattan.

There are many ways to get forgiveness especially if you send me lots of money.

                     Scott Shithead Simmons


Is our favorite little pervert and beloved in men's rooms all over the world .
He enjoys playing naked twister with his imaginary friends and loves internet porn sometimes with chicks in it .


He may be sexually confused but he knows what he wants at the end of the night so ladies if your in Kill Devil Hills tonight and see the UTB tour bus swing by cause Scotts on guard duty tonight and always lonely .


And remember UTB is no responsible for anything this crazy fucker does your welcome.