Wanted. by El Bastardo

                  

A senorita with huge maracas.
Who has lots of denaro and low standards .

A woman with strong legs and whom doesn't mind bubble gum for breakfast .

Or at least does not mind blowing things .

I want someone to walk through dis life with me .
To hold my cape while I wrestle other well oiled men into submission .

Who also loves reading poetry while drinking wine ico and making love to the Price Is Right all at once .

She must have big home for i need room to hold my many title belts and action figures .

What senor does not enjoy playing with himself ?

I seek a senorita who understands the depth of a man's soul and has a trapeze over the bed .

A senorita that will understand a true man wears his mask to bed and sometimes has sensitive nipples .

I know you are out there somewhere longing to be with the greatest luchador poetry writing masked superstar and small business owner of all times


If reading to take the penguin  by the horns .

Please send email with picture resume and social security number for background check ico to dis fine publication .


Kiss kiss

  El Bastardo

Is currently busy trying to collect pesos to fund his campaign to become President of the United States because why not?

He holds many title's all over the world and is the father of at least 500 children.

He holds a degree in interior design and is a spiritual guru to the stars.

He enjoys painting nude portraits of the invisible man .
And loves all mankind including Bill Gates .

When not on the road he resides in the Bat Cave as he kicked that pussy Batman's ass and evicted him.

He can also be found giving seminars on Wrestling and Poetry .

He collects moon rocks and limited edition Golden Girls action figures .

He will be giving a reading at the Old Country Buffet this Thursday .

He is currently working on his new book.

Last Tussle In The Senior Center .

And looking for a publisher soon.

Ole 🌹