Beautiful by John Patrick Robbins

"John, your such an asshole! I cannot believe you didn't nominate me for Best Of The Net!!!!" 

"Well I was going to, at one of my other forty something magazines."

"Omg, I knew you recognized what a great writer I am."

"Well I mean sweetheart you failed to notice, I said I was going to nominate you. Now please lose my number and sincerely fuck off."

I hung the up phone and basked in the silence and mixed a good stiff drink.

Being an editor is to be hated on every level possible.

I don't take pleasure in telling spoiled ego's no.

Shit who am I kidding, of course I do.

Because if you didn't know I am Satan.

Cheers kids.

#drinkingfortheapocalypse

John Patrick Robbins aka Coyote, aka The Mad Editor.
Is currently dead and no longer receiving calls or reading submissions.
Or snarky comments from people who act tough then will piss their pants the minute a firecracker goes off.

He is currently buried in Al Capone's vault where he awaits Geraldo to unearth him.
Which will in turn bring on the zombie apocalypse.