It's Just A Sprain. by John Patrick Robbins

                 

The night was perfect we headed home both in that bliss of the buzz .

Susan was always a party girl and that's what drew her and Frank together .

They flew down the back roads  music blasting .

"Pull in at the park ".

"I swear kid you got the bladder of a hamster "

"I don't have to pee dumbass I want your dick ".

"Sweetheart you know how it works me up when you talk sexy like that ".

"Baby anything works you up".

Frank pulled into Creeds park the same little spot on the back roads  his friend Gary had fell asleep at the wheel and crashed through the sign.

They still hadn't replaced the damn thing .

Frank quickly pulled into the little park and killed the lights .
Hopped in the backseat and got the party started.

Sometimes words were wasted when the actions are what matter the most .

Truly the best perk about Susan being younger than Frank was she was always ready to go.

It was a bliss no words could truly describe and simple backseat fuck all the same .

"I want to ride you"

Susan said and Frank certainly didn't object .

The radio kept on playing honestly Frank couldn't recall the tune if his life depended on it and if someone could then they weren't doing it right .

She rode it like a damn bull in the rodeo and with every grind it was perfection in every sense .

She was getting closer to orgasm when she started speeding up and then it happened .

The pain was instant it was like flying a hundred miles a hour then hitting the fucking pavement .

"Baby are you alright "?

"Fucking hell my I think my dick's broke "!

It felt like the fucker had been ripped off and set on fire all at the same time .

Susan always liked it ruff and treated sex like a damn battle well from the pain Frank was in he was certainly ready to surrender .

"Baby I'm so sorry are you okay".

"Well besides my dick being snapped in two I'm fucking fantastic .

Susan tried not to laugh.

She turned on the dome light .

"Baby it's already bruising "

The pain would not fucking subside and although in agony he had to almost laugh when he thought to himself .

This was going to be awkward going to the emergency room with.

Although if male patients herd this they would probably be more quick to cringe than laugh as he imagined the nurses doing .


"Baby from what I read on google it says it's probably a sprain".

"I'm glad to know you can google broken dicks when in a emergency , maybe if I had just let you google it to begin with i wouldn't be in this shit to begin with".

Susan was damn near in tears from laughter course if Frank didn't feel like his dick had been ripped off by some farm machinery he would probably be laughing to.

Everything hurt as he got in the driver's seat .

Susan couldn't even look at Frank without laughing .

"I'm glad you can laugh about this you twisted little bitch ".

"Aw I'm sorry baby want me to kiss it and make it better ".

Frank had to laugh at that one .

"Yeah I think I better not chance my luck. besides think you done enough damage for one night ".

Frank started the old car and decided to head home .

The pain was a little less what it was a minute ago.

He definitely needed another drink hold the ice he had better use for it tonight .

They were headed home Susan still giggled on a occasion.

Frank had to love her for anyone else tried to cripple his manhood he would have  placed them in a unmarked grave .

She laid against him kissing his neck and he was finally relaxed .

And just then the blue balls kicked in.


                      ...Fin

John Patrick Robbins 

Better known as the Mad Editor 

Currently is under house arrest apparently having mans best friend be your designated

driver is  frowned upon in most States .

When not writing or starting magazines for fun he enjoys drinking till he  blacks out and writing the perverted crap you just read.

He one day will put out a book when he learns that publishers don't except submissions written in crayon .

His  publications include .

The Inmate Of The Month Press, Somebody Farted Magazine , Something In My Pocket Review , Cuddling With Bears Ezine ,The Street Walker Named Desmond Poerty Collection,

The I Can't Believe Your Still Reading This Lit Mag , And Tiger Beat Magazine .

His work is always demented no wonder he is still single .

Stay Crazy Kids